Medical theories are traditionally based on dissection of cadavers and other such arcane arts. In my experience, though, I haven’t found cadavers to be models of digestion— except from the point of view of maggots and other underground creepy-crawlies. Since I was hoping to focus on other unsavory topics, let’s try another tactic.

I believe it was in a commercial (and not one for a new anti-bacterial yogurt) where I recently heard again the oft-touted factoid that we are comprised of more bacteria cells than human cells. Inspired by this surprising revelation, I have pieced together the following theory of the human digestive process, based on my own personal experience and just short of one visit to an actual sausage factory:

Sausage Grinders
“Eat somethin’ that’ll stick to your ribs,” Grandpa said.
The body, to him, was a bag of skin filled with air
and a popsicle-stick skeleton.
Sticky food, I guess, adhered to the bones,
a meat and potato popsicle
that moths and bees lick for sustenance.
Moth and bee farts kept the skin-balloon filled.

It’s a mechanized world now
we are sausage grinders
the butcher crams it in
our blades chew it up
we make little loaves
and squish them out.

Some sticks to the blades
the night rats scavenge
lick the blades clean
make their own little wieners;
some stay too long
become sausage themselves
when the morning shift starts.

We are clean green grinding machines
fueled on rat gas and moth farts
we are composting bins
in a landfill world
we stink and we’re slow
but we get the job done
if the world can wait
and hold its nose.

Thanks to Luc Besson for the little exchange that set this grinder in motion:

Police officer outside door: “Are you classified as human?”
Korben Dallas: “Negative. I am a meat popsicle.” —The Fifth Element (1997)

Thanks for reading. Cheers,

Photo by silverfox09